I have failed countless times to update this blog, and I have a feeling no one really reads anymore. However, since this was where I started writing it always feels most comforting to return to write short bit about my life here

I was browsing today this article where a number of individuals had submitted pictures or scans of their teenage diaries. I have hardly graduated out of teenhood myself; once a very interesting character told me that you don't truly stop being a teen until you've passed 25 years of age. Sometimes not even then. Yet I can't help but look at (the now hidden) entries that used to chronicle my life in secondary school and then in junior college. I was a very different person then, and yet, not so.

As I write this now, I am waiting for myself to fall asleep, for the memories in my head to die down so I may just tumble into a nice dreamless sleep.

Yet sleep evades me, as it naturally does when you need to wake mere hours later for the most important task of school. It feels so new all over again, because people just come and go and come back again.

But enough of my rambling, I should really try to at least close my eyes and lay down, and hope that eventually sleep will take me.

To all those people who left my life, I miss you. You know who you are

<3 M

maanantaina, marraskuuta 21, 2005

ALHENA!

the ogl camp was great. until towards the end. but anyways, first the good and then the bad.

the first day we had wet and wild. was super fun, and our group had quite a number for former zosma members. alhena soooo rocked. anyways, we had loadsa fun getting wet, cheering ourselves hoarse and just acting dumb lar. then yijun and me broke away from alhena to go for band prac. we were very very afraid that ms sia would scold us for being late and having lunch while everyone else was having sectionals. so we kept a lookout for her just in case and fortunately, finished on time and headed to the band room. was on my toes the whole time during practice. nearly died of fright. and i had to wipe my palms on my skirt thrice as many times as usual. they were very clammy. and i played many wrong notes, and fumbled many many times. terrible.

after that we left for ogl camp again. we learnt the new couple dance! jon ma was laughing at me cos i was too tall for my first partner to twirl me, so i had to change partners. bleah. but its very nice, accidentally in love by counting crows. the best part has to be where we exchange partners. such an adrenaline high. after that we went for dinner and went back for dial m. i tried to help my group along my speeding them up so we could finish faster. was kinda boring since i already have played. but the end was priceless. i felt like laughing when they came up with the "satanic ritual" idea. and that Mr Seetoh killed his own son. memories memories. i loved the game during band camp, but i must say that it has sorat lost its appeal since i knew all the clues. the others enjoyed it though, which is great! Ruzaini, Zhijun and Amelia were asking me for the actual ending but i refused to tell them. was kinda mean, but i had to. haha. sorry guys.

after that we had sharing session and we slept. was terrible sleeping because it was too cold. i first slept with my head on the table like usual, but then had to shift into my sleeping bag cos i was freezing. i woke up early and bathed and then we had breakfast.

aft breakfast we had a super dance session that lasted 3 hours. the ultimate workout. was for the other new mass dance which is also very very nice. and then we had OH time.

so the bad bit comes here. i msut say i'm the most accident prone person i've ever met. (besides wenqi of course) i visited first aid 3 times. yep 3, not once or twice. the first time was because i had a blister and needed a plaster. the second time was to get eye drops because of eye irritation. the third time was the worst.

i was outside the hall during OH time, happily minding my own business and we were about to proceed to area cleaning when a gust of wind came and blew the big rolling whiteboards outside the hall right on top of me. the metal edge hit my lower back and bore the entire weight of the board. at that point i was in shock and suddenly i felt a sharp stabbing pain where the board hit me and i remembered. oh no. my back problem. the pain just got worse and worse so i started to cry and you mei had to bring me to first aid.

terrible. the councillors were super nice and tried to help me ease the pain as best they could. i went to mobilize my back, so the pain would go away faster and it worked! it really started to subside. then mr yao brought me to the doctor's along with loulle and azlyn and i got some muscle relaxants and ointment. so i went home and slept the pain off.

i must ask. why. why is it ALWAYS me who has these kind of freak accidents. first it was at the nyaa camp where i injured my knee on the first day and couldn't go for the expedition. then it was jogathon where i fell at the starting line and was stopped from running three quarters of the way. after that was the next years jogathon when my back gave me problems cos i was crouching too long. and then it was obs when i got exhausted and dehydrated from the heat during the land expedition and was unaware on my own actions. after that i sprained my ankle numerous times, including on court during flooball at mj. and now this. WHY. you know i would rather be suffering with my fellow team mates than suffering from pain alone and being looked after by other people. i want to look after my team mates, not vice versa.

and you know what. as if its not enough. my lower back is still sore and i still have to depend on the muscle relaxants to rid me of some of the pain. see. some of the pain. not all. cos my spine is hurting too, not just the muscles. the doctor said that if it still hurts tomorrow then i have to go for an xray. i don't want an xray. i can't afford to waste more time on being injured. i need to do loads of things, and i'm just hampered by the pain and the annoying fact that if i over exert myself then i will need more medical help. just when i'm raring to go.

i'm so dumb i'm so dumb i'm so dumb i'm so dumb.

terrible. at least i did manage to somethow offer my help today at school during the meeting with the rest of the alhenians. alhena never dies =) and i'm treasurer! at least i'm doing something useful. instead of laying around like some invalid. bleah.

i just wish the pain will not bother me anymore tomorrow morning.

to the rest of the alhenians going for sentosa tomorrow, have a great time! i really wish i could join all of you.

i have to get some sleep, going to the doctors again tomorrow morning.

heippa then

marlz

maanantaina, marraskuuta 21, 2005

ALHENA!

11/21/2005 04:15:00 ip.

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