I have failed countless times to update this blog, and I have a feeling no one really reads anymore. However, since this was where I started writing it always feels most comforting to return to write short bit about my life here
I was browsing today this article where a number of individuals had submitted pictures or scans of their teenage diaries. I have hardly graduated out of teenhood myself; once a very interesting character told me that you don't truly stop being a teen until you've passed 25 years of age. Sometimes not even then. Yet I can't help but look at (the now hidden) entries that used to chronicle my life in secondary school and then in junior college. I was a very different person then, and yet, not so.
As I write this now, I am waiting for myself to fall asleep, for the memories in my head to die down so I may just tumble into a nice dreamless sleep.
Yet sleep evades me, as it naturally does when you need to wake mere hours later for the most important task of school. It feels so new all over again, because people just come and go and come back again.
But enough of my rambling, I should really try to at least close my eyes and lay down, and hope that eventually sleep will take me.
To all those people who left my life, I miss you. You know who you are
<3 M
marlz. daughter. sister. friend. cousin. girl. 1988. born to die.
sunnuntai, elokuuta 21, 2005
delicious books
i was video conferencing with my grandparents today. the thing about grandparents and technology is that they just don't match. my grandparents are considered one of the tech savy ones, though they do still grapple with having to control the machine and also with their fears that the monitor will blow up.
amidst the static and the webcam jamming up on us, i got quite a bit across to them. esp säsä who greeted me with a "hei pikku pentu!". hehe. so it is true after all that you'll always be the littlest girl in your grandparents eyes. its fun, cos i'm the eldes ant get pampered a whole lot AND i love them =)
anyways, i also received some really sad news. that lovely partasen lady has passed on during the course of this week. i did feel my heart sink when i heard of it. and i feel sorry for mr partanen, because i know that he's very sad. they were so warm hearted and welcoming and even met me and sent me off with an embrace, even though i hardly recall them at all. and they were so nice. especially her. and she won my heart when i was there. little did i know it was going to be the last time i would see her. it is a sad blow, although we know each other for such a short while. it isn't my first encounter with death (pappa was the first one) but i guess we all need to move on. after all, we are born to die, and will all pass on in the end. it is always sad, but it is how life is, and i know, whatever and whoever i may lose in future, i must take it in stride because it is how things work. i just hope that it was painless for her, and that she can rest in peace.
talking abt finland makes me realise how much i miss the place and the fresh air. geez, if only singapore had air as fresh and as cool and as delightful to breathe. i would take big gulps of air should it be that way, instead of the smokey and humid air we do have. *sighs*
i've encountered a number of delicious books this week. stepford wives was NOT one of them. pretty short book, but freaky one still. i didn't watch the movie so i kinda sniffed at the thin paperback and read it, although i was annoyed with the large print. pickwick papers. hah. that is a delicious book. and it always makes me very hungry whenever i read it. gosh. hardly know why, but it is a nice book. then there was this catherine lim book in the library of which i read the first few chapters during a free period and absolutely fell in love with. a dictionary on karelian slang. and a finn book i found on the shelf. its a book of poems. here's one by aleksis kivi...
Oravan laulu
Makeasti oravainen
Makaa sammalhuoneessansa;
Sinnepä ei Hallin hammas
Eikä metsämiehen ansa
Ehtineet millionkaan.
Kammiostann korkeasta
Katselee hän mailman piirii,
Taisteloa allans' monta;
Havu-oksan rauhan-viiri
päällänsä liepoittaa.
Mikä elo onnellinen
keinuvassa kehtolinnas!
Siellä kiikkuu oravainen
Armaan kuusen äitinrinnas:
Metsolan kantele soi!
Siellä torkkuu heiluhäntä
Akkunalla pienoisella,
Linnut laulain taivaan alla
Saattaa hänen iltasella
Unien Kultalaan.pretty pretty pretty...wish i could write something as pretty as that. but i'm no poet and i'm a terrible writer as ppl already notice from my blog. heh. what to do. i'm nowhere near FAIR standard and i aim for GOOD. sheesh. talk about aiming too high.
tomorrow i don't have to wake early. hurray...
toodles~
marlz
the grass so dry, smelt so sweet in the heat of noon
8/21/2005 01:29:00 ip.