I have failed countless times to update this blog, and I have a feeling no one really reads anymore. However, since this was where I started writing it always feels most comforting to return to write short bit about my life here
I was browsing today this article where a number of individuals had submitted pictures or scans of their teenage diaries. I have hardly graduated out of teenhood myself; once a very interesting character told me that you don't truly stop being a teen until you've passed 25 years of age. Sometimes not even then. Yet I can't help but look at (the now hidden) entries that used to chronicle my life in secondary school and then in junior college. I was a very different person then, and yet, not so.
As I write this now, I am waiting for myself to fall asleep, for the memories in my head to die down so I may just tumble into a nice dreamless sleep.
Yet sleep evades me, as it naturally does when you need to wake mere hours later for the most important task of school. It feels so new all over again, because people just come and go and come back again.
But enough of my rambling, I should really try to at least close my eyes and lay down, and hope that eventually sleep will take me.
To all those people who left my life, I miss you. You know who you are
<3 M
marlz. daughter. sister. friend. cousin. girl. 1988. born to die.
perjantaina, elokuuta 13, 2004
infuriated
well...today was friday the 13th which prolly explains ET's behaviour today...i mean...i just walk into class aft worrying abt my council and i realise that he is giving everyone a tongue lashing...at first i was like "hallo?! since when did we mistreat Mdm Zainab?"...all the crap abt mistreating the teacher...only aft some time did i realise that it was Mdm Liu he was talking abt not the ML pupils...i mean pls, for our class, malay language results were relatively gd...i personally think that my result was a miracle...there were 4 A1s in the level and all were swept by our class...and the rest also did quite well...just storming into class like that may have been what he thought was right...and i do admit our class needs a wake up call...but hallo...it not only put the Chi students down...it put us down...do we not deserve any credit? not trying to be racist here but hey...there ARE malays and tamil language students in your class...and i know the malay language students worked hard to get their A1s...so did i to get my B4...B4, i know it aint great in the eyes of others...but pls...the amt of effort i put in and the amount of effort put in by those helping me certainly is great...are they not allowed their tears of joy? they were GENUINELY overwhelmed...and this may be a preview of the big thing...think abt it...if they put this much effort for the "preview"...what abt next year? are you VERY sure that they won't get any gd results? and to i felt upset over the issue...i mean, it could have been handled in a better way...without putting even those who worked hard down...so well, abt thinking that he was unreasonable? i dun really think he was...there was some truth to what was said...just that...i feel angry that the whole grp was scolded...sure, it may be "all for one, one for all" in band...but its not so for 4/6...in the end when we tackle our o's, its every man/woman for him/herself...i wish he would take this into consideration...oh btw, i think the class knows what HILARIOUS means...dun have to rub it in that we are in a premier choice school either...it was not my choice, and i'm sure, many did not have a choice either...
oh btw, i was happy to see mdm zainab and tell her that i am not retaking the paper...and she told me that she was happy for me...which made me even happier...yay!
HP showed me something in the 4/1 classroom wall...i think it was a good one..."There are 2 ways to disaster : one is to take the advice of others, the other is to not take anyone's advice"...something along those lines...very well said HP...its true, and i hope ppl do think abt that...
well...turning pt in our life? i do agree wholeheartedly...some feel they screwed up their lives...others? well...they deserve those tears of joy that they shed...now it just that last lap of the race that we have to overcome...and then, good riddance to everything here...*dreams*...
the "
you-know-who" who turned up at sch today was supposed to ask me something regarding my post...unfortunately "you-know-who" did not...and you left me waiting...you turned and passed me by...no words at all...not a single one...sigh...is it worth waiting for you at all? hope that "
cigam" occurs once more...its what made me know abt you...i hope you reply soon
well...more updates later...wanna sleep since i have this aftnoon to myself...
8/13/2004 02:30:00 ap.