I have failed countless times to update this blog, and I have a feeling no one really reads anymore. However, since this was where I started writing it always feels most comforting to return to write short bit about my life here
I was browsing today this article where a number of individuals had submitted pictures or scans of their teenage diaries. I have hardly graduated out of teenhood myself; once a very interesting character told me that you don't truly stop being a teen until you've passed 25 years of age. Sometimes not even then. Yet I can't help but look at (the now hidden) entries that used to chronicle my life in secondary school and then in junior college. I was a very different person then, and yet, not so.
As I write this now, I am waiting for myself to fall asleep, for the memories in my head to die down so I may just tumble into a nice dreamless sleep.
Yet sleep evades me, as it naturally does when you need to wake mere hours later for the most important task of school. It feels so new all over again, because people just come and go and come back again.
But enough of my rambling, I should really try to at least close my eyes and lay down, and hope that eventually sleep will take me.
To all those people who left my life, I miss you. You know who you are
<3 M
marlz. daughter. sister. friend. cousin. girl. 1988. born to die.
keskiviikkona, tammikuuta 21, 2004
well...its the lunar new yr idreamt of sumthin just now while having my nap...meow...oh my...wasn't it a great dream...in fact...it was a really great dream...nahz...actually it wasn't...i dreamt of school...but isn't school great...yea...its was so yummylicious...meowza...
well...i have beeen quite bored at home...yup..bored...i chat just now to my senior...and nothin else...then basically sleep and have some reading time to myself...
after that i have to do some chores...boooring...fold clothes...and then my sis fren call...want to pass sumthin to her...i dunno lar...so bored that i followed her...i guess it was okay...windy nite...i wish i was out wif sumone...at the beach or sumfin...
anyway, got a bbq tml...and i think they are ovenighting at the beach...i get to walk abt...again...alone...in the wind...beside the sea..under a canopy of stars...a cloudless evening...i will wear black..again...and my lovely chain...yesh...as i always do...and walk and think...as i look at the waves crashing upon the shore...serenity...
so...well...i goin to my fren's house fer CNY...and i forgot to buy chockies fer her...mann...the shop wont be open tml...but i want to go out...darn...
i want a dress...weird isn't it...freaky...maybe i'm still high on the fake happiness i've been feeding myself...yesh...that's why i was bouncing off the walls...and still am...a black dress....that is quite long...arnd knee length you know? and it must be black...if there is any pattern its okay...crazy...freaky..me...the one who said she would never wear a dress for grad nite...yup...i think i wont for grad nite...but its not grad nite rite? and besides..i'm a girl...i have every right to wear a dress...yup...i think i will get a dress aft all...and also fer grad nite we will wear our skool uniform...how not nice...
bittersweet...piquant...soaring...melodious...mellow...
1/21/2004 02:54:00 ip.