I have failed countless times to update this blog, and I have a feeling no one really reads anymore. However, since this was where I started writing it always feels most comforting to return to write short bit about my life here
I was browsing today this article where a number of individuals had submitted pictures or scans of their teenage diaries. I have hardly graduated out of teenhood myself; once a very interesting character told me that you don't truly stop being a teen until you've passed 25 years of age. Sometimes not even then. Yet I can't help but look at (the now hidden) entries that used to chronicle my life in secondary school and then in junior college. I was a very different person then, and yet, not so.
As I write this now, I am waiting for myself to fall asleep, for the memories in my head to die down so I may just tumble into a nice dreamless sleep.
Yet sleep evades me, as it naturally does when you need to wake mere hours later for the most important task of school. It feels so new all over again, because people just come and go and come back again.
But enough of my rambling, I should really try to at least close my eyes and lay down, and hope that eventually sleep will take me.
To all those people who left my life, I miss you. You know who you are
<3 M
marlz. daughter. sister. friend. cousin. girl. 1988. born to die.
sunnuntai, tammikuuta 11, 2004
had my CCA open house...first performance fer many juniors...and a time fer performance jitters...and some ppl to get scolded before they notice there is ACTUALLY and audience right in fornt WATCHING....gosh...
sallehin was so sweet, he got the band to sing a happi bdae song...so embarrasing...but still, sweet...fadzly never got thru wif his mass sabo-ing...erkerker...and i finally did get saboed by none other than eric...he throw ball bery bery painful...esp on the face...
but i got a number of presents...all nice and meaningful...and with a lot of though behind them...thank you guys...i love ya ppl...
then we had prac wif anthony chew and he did some stuff changin the set up...i finally feel as if we are havin a real band prac...and he took the brasses...and changed our sound...it was real great to hear the band rebuildin...and then i was off to the music room
i stayed there fer awhile...listenin to Beethoven...and also Mozart...cant seem to find his requeim though...darn...aniwae i was havin a capital time...those composers come up wif compellin music...until of course the parents came, i had some explainin to do...
and finally...i went down to perform...and help out...and receive more pressies...erkerker...then i was called up to go see mrs pang abt our presentation...and get saboed...and also to ask the rest to finish up my chockies...and see whether alvin really would go on and do wat he sayed he would....but he din...too much of a gentleman...aww you coward...
i went home and got my LOTR book!!! its sooo nice and true...more than it seems to be...it seems to draw me right to it and i cant stop readin it...
and finally we went fer BBQ...yea...and got MORE pressies...and cooked up a storm...and saboed...AGAIN...with cake cream...gosh...guys....tat's not nice...
but then after a while...the sound of the sea drew me towards it...as it always does...and i sat down nearby...and all the memories came floodin back...everythin...even down colours....it was so vivid in my mind...tat i started talking it out...i wonder if i shall ever cross that sea once more...
so i came home...totally worn out...and i was lost in thought....
ranjani came over todae...to scan photos and stuff...and to email some stuff to others...and i went to buy my pressie fer Janice...the sweet gal...
yes...i have been wounded...and i think i will never really heal...for some wounds even time cannot heal...esp those of the heart
1/11/2004 01:09:00 ip.